Monday, December 6, 2010

Thirty Days of Us, Day 20

Oh noes! Cooper's back and bloggin up in here. So, today's lil' subject is..... "Someone you see yourself marrying or being with in the future"So, obvious answer, MEL! I mean, she's awesome, it's why I married her and Im lucky to have her. However, that's the easy way out of this. But how else to answer it? I could go the loves that where/could have been/might have been, but that'd end up with all sorts of negative responses and general no goodness, so pass I say!

For those of you who already know but need to be told again for some unknown reason, Mel and I (and Marcus) happen to be LDS, or as it is more commonly known, Mormon. Obviously by way of stereotypes that aren't based on any sort of fact within the last century this means we are also polygamists. Which means I'm failing miserably by having only 1 wife. So this blog will be a short thought trainwreck that explores my options for a second wife. Now, before I make things awkward for anyone I am limiting to people Mel and I don't personally know.

Now, one of the keys of polygamy is that both the husband and wife(ves) approve of the choice, since the new wife isn't just married to me she's also involved in Mel's life as family its important that it doesn't throw things off too much. Sadly this means I can't just throw out a list of super hot females like Scarlett Johansen, Jessica Biel, and others.... SO I guess the best place to start is going to be at what we (ok, mel's asleep and not involved in this post at all at the moment so that should be I) would need.

First things first, her personality is super important, she has to have a great sense of humor as well as being great in social events. I think we would both want her to be someone that people tend to gravitate towards and want to listen/speak with. After that you've got her background, and someone from a good family who knows what they want is key. Now, I've already got one amazing wife who happens to be white, and in todays forced politically correct world I'd hate to be seen as racist by only having white women with me so it should probably be someone of a different ethnic heritage. While Mel and I want a large family I think that would be the new woman's choice, but if she happens to have a great career that's awesome too! It's also important that she's politically knowledgeable so Mel isn't the only one to listen to me gripe. Looks? Well, Mel is gorgeous already, so I don't need yet another trophy wife.

I guess after all this its fairly obvious who Im talking about.... I mean it comes down to either Eva Mendes or Oprah Winfrey, and as much as I love Eva for having been in 2 fabulous movies (2fast 2furious and training day) I think Oprah Winfrey wins out with her 5 billion dollars and her own personal tv network, plus I kinda think she might be a lesbian (not that there's anything wrong with that) or at the very least not into massively awesome white dudes, so I don't have to worry about any bed time awkwardness. Also, since Mel is already my perfect girl already the only role she doesn't fill for me is sugar mama, and lets face it, Oprah would be the ultimate sugar mama.... except maybe JK Rowling and her billions and more physically attractiveness (not to mention being a better story teller) But then I'd be accused of being racist again so.........

Yep, you just read all that, and I apologize, as does this small kitty.
But that's about all... I mean, what else can you expect from a 1am post? Pin It


  1. Put down the crack pipe and nobody gets hurt. Hahaha! Love ya!

  2. Cooper, I like your writing style. Quite hilarious. I wish Travis would post on our blog more often so he can say sweet things about me like you say about Mel!!


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